a MMB! Kendo Blog: Please Give Me a Hand

MMB! Kendo Blog

Saturday, June 10, 2006


忍耐 + 掌握人生
Please Give Me a Hand

I could not express the agony I am having right now. It's not the physical pain of rupturing the hand ligament again. That alone would not drive me to such a depressed state. The emotional pain is quite unbearable. I don't know what to do now.

When I felt that tearing sensation in my left hand after that fateful taitari, my heart was shattered. The first thing that came to mind was the Australian Team selection trial. 3 weeks. That is all I've got now to make this silly hand to swing the shinai in champion fashion. Champion? I don't even dare to swing the shinai with my left hand now. Looking at the state of my left hand is like a thousand knieves stabbing into my heart. It is a tormenting thought. Why does it have to happen to me again. Why are there so many barriers to trip me over? I just want to realise my dream. The amount of effort put into getting my hand better - doing all the tasks and exercises that the doctor and physio handed down to me, and then seeing this happening again is heart-breaking. Just when I am getting so close to conquering this treacherous mountain, there, I tumbled all the way to the bottom of the unforgivingly cold and dark chasm.

I really don't know whether I can wear my kote again before rocking up to the Selection Trial. All I know is that I need to keep my body fit, my stamina and endurance up, my muscles strong. I can only hope that I could swing the shinai when I fit into that kote again.

I think I actually know what to do now. Fix up my head. Stop sulking. Get over this emotional thinking. And start doing something constructive. Keep fit and train with imagination and visualisation. Let's see if the result of my imaginative training will shine in 3 weeks time.

Next Tuesday (Mon is Queens b'day) I will have an ultrasound scan to evaluate the extent of the injury and make an appointment with the hand orthopaedic surgeon. On Wednesday, I will visit the hand physio for check-up.

Please I really need my hand back. I will do everything to take me to the World Championships!

posted by Vivian Yung at 3:56 PM

14 Comments:

  • You can borrow mine but you must promise that you will give it back.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Saturday, June 10, 2006 6:19:00 PM  

  • sorry to hear of your emotional torment but (without sounding rude)
    get over it think about all the training you have done and all the things you have learnt and that alone will be enough to get you through and good luck and gambatte

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Saturday, June 10, 2006 7:42:00 PM  

  • Eddie, are you sure you can go travelling to Japan and Europe with one hand? You are really kind indeed. Thanks for giving me a hand. (You have already given me one on MSN) Now take both your hands to experience all the wonderful things you are going to see in the next few weeks. Have fun exploring the beautiful world!

    By Blogger Vivian Yung, at Saturday, June 10, 2006 8:09:00 PM  

  • Ace, thanks for what you have said. As Komoto Sensei said to me, the best medicine is to maintain the cheerfulness and optimism. I will duly take the advice.

    By Blogger Vivian Yung, at Saturday, June 10, 2006 8:12:00 PM  

  • Oh vivian :(
    * hugs *

    But cheer up, it's nowhere near the end, just take care of yourself and in time you'll be back to kicking arse again. This is not the last opportunity and even if you miss out this year, you'll learn from this and improve much more for next year.

    I am sorry to hear about it though.

    By Blogger Quoth the raven, at Sunday, June 11, 2006 5:44:00 PM  

  • Have faith !! Never give up MMB !!

    By Blogger plautus, at Monday, June 12, 2006 11:09:00 AM  

  • if you cannot use the left hand, use the right one.
    if you cannot use both, use your legs.
    if you cannot use the legs, use your mind.

    you should just swing once to make a ippon, and win the match.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Tuesday, June 13, 2006 12:23:00 PM  

  • Thank you everyone. It is heart-warming to read your kind words.

    Today, I met a Saint.

    Prof. Bruce Connolly, a hand orthopaedic surgeon who have operated on Sporting Superstars, such as Wallabies Toutai Kefu, took my case immediately after hearing my condition and the timing for the Australian Team Selection.

    He first listened to my injury history and how it occured. Then he went on to examine my hand - first the good right hand, then the bad left hand. After that, he explained to me in details what he had planned for me to get my hand back on track. First, he said, I need to get the best hand scans and diagnosis from top physicians.

    So after meeting him, I went straight to the x-ray clinic to get ultrasound and x-ray scans. He was so kind enough to ring his secretary back in his CBD clinic and book a hand scan appointment time for me, so that I got immediate care as soon as I stepped into the x-ray clinic.

    We will meet again tomorrow when I go to Rosemary Prossor's Sydney Hand Physio and Rehab Clinic, which is located just one floor below his own hand surgery clinic. There, they will decide whether I will need a surgery or not.

    The most comforting words Prof. Connolly said to me: I will get you ready for the Selection Trial.

    Thanks Prof. You are my saviour.

    By Blogger Vivian Yung, at Tuesday, June 13, 2006 11:25:00 PM  

  • ask him and insist for a mri scan in your hand.
    it can be very useful.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Thursday, June 15, 2006 2:51:00 PM  

  • The ultrasound was able to reveal joint injury in the 5th CMC.

    The doctor examining the ultrasound was able to show me on the ultrasound screen the flexibility of the 3rd, 4th and 5th CMC joint.

    The 5th CMC joint is the most flexible out of all three. Whereas, the 3rd CMC joint is the least flexible.

    Due to the flexible nature of the 5th CMC joint, all we could say is a joint injury.

    I will have one hand physio session next Tuesday, and another session with Prof. Conolly on Wednesday.

    Then the Thursday after (two days before the Selection Trial), I will have a joint session with the Prof and hand physio. There, they will strap my hand up for the selection trial.

    I have been going to the local park at night to jog and practice footwork. So far it is going well.

    By Blogger Vivian Yung, at Friday, June 16, 2006 9:42:00 PM  

  • Ok, so if your Professor says you're going well, then stop worrying and fight on! By the time you are fully recovered, you'll have some extra brilliant footwork in your kendo.

    Best of luck in the selection!!

    By Blogger Mingshi, at Thursday, June 22, 2006 2:00:00 PM  

  • Thanks Mingshi. Will do my best in the trial. :)

    By Blogger Vivian Yung, at Friday, June 23, 2006 5:01:00 AM  

  • Hi Vivian hope you get well soon. Incidentally I broke my toe this week and won't be able to do kendo for a month, which is even more painfull than the actual injury. You must be feeling the same way.

    By the way, I like your blog very much. Looking forward to hear good news.

    By Blogger Unknown, at Saturday, June 24, 2006 4:57:00 AM  

  • Hi Ivan, I am sorry to hear your accident. Hope you will recover soon. Drink more milk and have more yoghurt, mate. :)

    Thank you for your nice regards about my blog. I also enjoy reading you and all my friends' comments. It is really fun and cheers me up to write more.

    Gambarimasu on your recovery!

    By Blogger Vivian Yung, at Saturday, June 24, 2006 4:54:00 PM  

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